Demons all over Hell rejoiced today as, for the first time in centuries, the price for gasoline has dropped below 5 souls per gallon.
"I'll finally be able to visit my family every week" said Abraxas, 32,486. "I'm sure my parents miss me; they haven't seen me in millennia."
When asked about why this drop in price is happening, Chief of the Department of Transportation, Belial Malkovich, had this to say, "Thanks to the rise of street preachers condemning people on a regular basis and use of Bible translations other than the King James, we've had no shortage of fuel for our wicked motorcycles."
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